Well, at least there’s that...

Well. I’ve found something common to all of us that will or can break us as human beings. I believe this one thing is at the heart of addictions, depression, anxiety, even sickness. It’s very powerful. The sad thing is we all have the remedy. All of us. We withhold this thing from people and it can break them.  It’s broken people who seemed to have everything they could ever want. It’s taken down giants and destroyed kings. But we all have the solution.  Why do we withhold it? Why do we set unreasonable expectations in order to give it to someone.  Is it worth holding on to? Is it worth hiding?  Have you reached a place where the lack of this one thing is breaking you? The thing is... we can be in a crowd of people, we can be famous, we can be in a family, but without this one thing we are like flowers dying in a garden full of rich soil. We need this one thing. Yet we withhold it from those around us. What is this thing that breaks a soul , wears a heart down, takes away hope, c

We’ve talked about making yourself “worth “ it to others. It’s important that you stand up for yourself or how will your children know how to stand up for themselves? Abuse victims have learned that they can not stand up for themselves. Once I was asked “Why didn’t you slap him?” I couldn’t . I literary was frozen in time. I couldn't scream, I couldn’t fight back, I had learned to be helpless. This type of learned helplessness combined with PTSD is a living nightmare. Not only are you reliving your worst experience you are helpless to do anything about it. I remember after the car accident. I had recurring dreams that I was driving a car that I could not stop. Every time, the brakes went out. Every time I pushed them as hard as I could and every time I failed. PTSD is torment. It wakes you up, it keeps you awake, it torments you and it can even get mixed in with the foundation of your very being. I’ve talked about this before in my blog “PTSD and the Egyptians.” I recommend

At one point in my life I felt that I had little to no value.  I did exactly as I was expected to do in every situation. I tried to do what was fair and just even to my own detriment. I thought that if I was the one who got hurt I could handle it. I thought I was doing the right thing. I was being “brave”! Or was I? Victims of abuse want to believe they are the only victims. We would never want anyone to experience the hell we have. But that’s the problem. Because we are convinced that it’s all about us we don’t confront the abuser. We learn to “take it” predators tell victims that they are irrational, that they are misunderstanding the motives of the abuser. My favorite line when confronting an abuser is “How could you think that of me?” Because it’s true. If it quacks like a duck,  pretty confidant it’s a duck. No more cover ups. Mothers. If your child feels “uneasy “ Or tells you that someone is “ creepy” about someone do NOT disregard that. Do not make it a spiritual issue. Somethi

I was reading in the book of Esther this morning and an interesting thought popped into my head. Thoughts run through frequently. Glad I caught this one! When Ester realized that her uncle was in distress she did something interesting. Her uncle Morticia was sitting by the gate in “sackcloth and ashes”.  Sounds terribly uncomfortable. She sent him some new clothes and he refused to wear them. After she couldn’t “fix” her Uncle she decided to find out what the problem was. Unfortunately the problem required a lot more from her than the “fixing” would have. So, there’s  her Uncle, sitting in sackcloth and fasting. He’s intent on finding an answer to this life or death situation. He lets Esther know the problem and she realizes the severity. In case she thought she was “special” because of being the queen or that her position would save her, Morticia tells her plainly that she won’t escape, plus she was their only hope. His words to her were, “For such a time as this” resonate

I find it interesting that God uses ,”I Am” statements. God says “I am that I am”. Jesus also uses “I Am” statements. He said, “I am The way, the truths, the life “. How do we define ourselves? What are your ,” I am” statements? When you start describing yourself what words do you use? Does it sound something like..,” I’m fat/skinny”? “Short/ tall? Smart/educated, ignorant, lazy, frustrated, too young/ too old? “. If these are the statements you use to describe yourself I wouid like to offer some alternatives. Every phrase mentioned above has one common theme... they are perspectives that can be changed. “I hear you say, “I can’t change my height? If I’m short, I’m just short!” So, let me ask you this....who are you comparing your height to and does your height define you?” I’ve met and dated men that had the “ I’m short” mentality. Guess who suffered from their acceptance of their limitations? Everyone who wanted to have a relationship with them.  Yep, once you define yourself

Guess what? In this life there are many choices. We can either live on this earth as slaves or servants. What’s the difference you may ask? I mean both are work related, right? What difference does it make? I’m glad you asked. I’m going to lay this out pretty matter of fact so there will be no misunderstanding, I’m going to describe the life of a slave and I’m not pulling any punches or apologizing for what I’m going to say. It is the way it is (was). Let’s define slaves: obligated BY FORCE! Nobody is a slave voluntarily, People did not go to the continents and ask people, “Hey! This would be fun! We’re going to make you work. We aren’t going to pay you, We may or may not feed or clothe you and by the way, if you try to leave we will inflict bodily harm upon you, One ore thing, We’re going to separate you from your family and your tribe and your nation, Doesn’t that sound like a wonderful opportunity? PS, If your strong..we will sell you... So, servant? If I work for you I demand

Has anyone sent out an invitation with a RSVP? It’s actually French for: yes, I’ll be there. There are certain events that are by invitation only. They include some and exclude others. Have you ever found out that you weren’t invited to an event, but someone you knew was? I think we’ve all been left out a time or two. Did you ask yourself, “why not me?” “What did I do to them?” Haven’t we all been there? There are some places that do not require invitations. Just like, I don’t have to be invited to “be sad”. But I can be invited to “be happy.”  Some say that sickness needs an invitation. Yes and no. If I stay out late, don’t take care of my body, don’t get enough rest, or eat healthy then I’m inviting sickness. Here’s a question. If we invite sickness why do we pray for healing? Something to think about.  But does sickness need an invitation? No. If it  comes uninvited can I legitimately ask for healing? Of course. What if I invited sickness? Can I ask for healing? Certainly. Thi

I’ve been told that there are two kinds of people in this world, but I beg to differ. The thought is that there are givers and takers.  But I would like to add two more categories to the mix. Consumers and creators. To have a well balanced life you have to be a little bit of all of the above. If all you do is give, you run out of ...well, everything. If all you do is take, it’s never enough. If all you do is consume, life is empty and void of purpose. If all you do is create, you will be frustrated because you might depend solely on your audience for validation. So, I’ve been thinking about the role of a consumer. I’ve been very unhappy for many years. Do not confuse that with joy, True joy never fades because the source is never ending! But happiness is a different animal. I’ve given and given and felt like I was giving into an empty bucket with a hole in it, I’ve consumed and not been satisfied.  I have an allotted amount of money to live on, You see I have outlived my expirati

So, I have dealt with insomnia for many, many, many...did I say Many? Years. It's gotten much better over the years, but still... blissful sleep has eluded me. Recently I watched some Youtube videos on successful people. I noted some common themes and I thought I'd share them with you today. Successful people do not do this: Keep their cell phones in their room at night Check their messages, email or Facebook until after they have exercised and prepared for the day. What? Could it make that much of a difference? I wondered, so I gave it a try. Two nights ago I kept my cell phone out of my room. I had it in another room, used my regular alarm clock and slept like a baby! Not a screaming baby, a content baby. Plus I woke up earlier, more refreshed and peaceful. My days have been more focused as well. So the next thing successful people do daily is : Set goals for the day! It seems that our brains have a limited supply of decision making time available. If we use tha

Deuteronomy 8: 17 You may say in your heart, “The power and the strength of my hand has made this wealth for me.”  18 But remember   that it is the LORD   your God   who   gives   you the power to gain   wealth,   in order to   confirm   His covenant   that   He swore   to your fathers,   as it is this day.   19 If you ever forget the LORD your God and go after other gods to worship and bow down to them, I testify against you today that you will surely perish.… I have given this scripture much thought. I’ve heard people say everything from giving God all the glory for everything positive that you do. Yes, that is true. I’ve also heard people say, “It wasn’t me.””  I agree with both views to a degree.  What about pride? Again. Remember pride is assuming who you are without proof. Confidence is knowing who you are and who you are not. I must know who I am in Christ and who I am not on my own. Today I’d like to put a little twist on this verse. God definitely gives the power, the i