Pray for those who use you? How?

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Okay, so the Bible clearly says to "pray for those who spitefully use you."

 I thought that meant that I was supposed to pray that the Lord would bless them.
But lately I've been thinking. If Jesus told the disciples to "dust off their feet" from the towns that did not accept them coming in his name, why would he want me to bless those who use me with an evil purpose?

I've also heard to "Bless those that curse you." How do you do that? I've heard people "bless people out" that cursed them... ha! But how do you bless someone that curses you? Do you give them stuff? Do you pray that their enemies fall at their feet? Do you ask God to make them rich and add no sorrow to it? .....umm...NO!

I've also heard scripture taken out of context saying that "Job's difficulties turned around after he prayed for his friends."  So, how do I bless them?  See, it's confusing. Here's the scripture references:

Matthew 5:44

"But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you.

"bless those who curse you, and pray for those who spitefully use you.

Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse.

But then there's this?

Mark 6:11

"And whoever will not receive you nor hear you, when you depart from there, shake off the dust under your feet as a testimony against them. Assuredly, I say to you, it will be more tolerable for Sodom and Gomorrah in the day of judgment than for that city!"

Job 42:10 
10 After Job had prayed for his friends, the LORD restored his fortunes and gave him twice as much as he had before.


I interpreted all of that as I should pray for people who hate me; like they were my friends. No!  Job forgave his friends because they were his friends. They didn't mean him any harm, they were just misinformed.  But if someone chooses to use you, betray you or speak evil of you, asking a blessing on them is not justified. So, how do I bless them?

To bless: a primary preposition ...denoting a fixed position... and a relationship of rest (Strong's Exhaustive Concordance)

I'm supposed to have a fixed position against my enemies ( let my no be no and my yes be yes) and a relationship of rest with those who spitefully use me? Now that makes sense!

How do I pray for those who "spitefully use me?" :

"Don't let them do any more harm."

Then what?  Be stable and live at peace with them as best as you know how.

 Prayer and posture....I don't know why I always thought that meant I had to bow down to someone who was cruel, or to give preference to my enemies. Jesus never did that. He took a stand against them. He called them "liars and sons of the devil." He did not say, "awww...you poor thing. You used me so I want God to rain down blessings from Heaven" No

But what about the cross? Jesus did not bless those who crucified him, he simply forgave them because he understood that in order for scripture to be fulfilled, it had to happen. They literally did not know what they were doing.

Forgiveness is to release them the from a "Debt they owe you". It's recognizing the wrong and letting God handle it.

It's good to know that Jesus wasn't crazy. Forgiveness: sets the person who has been abused free. 

The only way the abuser can be free is to repent to God himself and then to you.


For all of us who have been through horrible treatment, I hope this gives you confidence as to how to pray. It is not God's will for you to suffer at the hands at another. It isn't His will for you to ask God to prosper them.  It is His will for us to set the abuser free from our own hands and souls, which means that God has all the right to take up for you. 

Please...pray for your abusers: "Do not let them do any more harm." For all of our sakes.

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